A man goes to a prostitute continuously for 1 year and he had 100 times sex with her. Now, imagine this guy is told to pay a pension of Rs.8000 every month to the prostitute for whole life. That is what alimony actually is. It is a social mechanism enforced by law to treat wife as a prostitute and make the man a permanent free ATM Machine giving pension to her for life time.
Of course, one can argue that a wife not only provides sex, she provides also provides love, care to husband, maintains house etc etc and hence she needs to be paid. Very valid argument. Yet, the concept of alimony does not work on this argument. It works on the former argument that the wife is a kind of prostitute and the man has to take responsibility of that woman-child irrespective of her contribution. Our societies infantilize women and makes man responsible to take care of this woman-child.
It does not require rocket science to estimate to a high degree of accuracy, the contributions a woman makes to husband in a marriage. A cost can always be assigned to that contribution, which the husband can be made to pay to the woman. However, the law makers and the society always avoid this very simple argument to quantify a woman’s contribution or sacrifice. In fact, they will go one step further and claim that this contribution of a woman as infinite or unmeasurable. This is just an excuse to ensure that men take disproportionate amount of responsibilities in the society. That is why men die earlier than women.
It is well known throughout history that men always consumed less (food) than they produced. The biggest beneficiaries of this exploitation is women. For example, 10 men hunt a wild boar. What work did their women do? They got to eat the boar meat for free. Of course, the women produced children. But, children do not belong to only men. Children belong to both. So, what did the woman contribute? She gave sex to the man. Then even that is mutual; the man and woman provided sex to each other. So, what else? The woman nurtured the children and took care of old people or sick men. Still, the work is not comparable and the men over produced more and consumed less, while women produced less and consumed more.
It is a great myth that women work more than men. It is like claiming the security guard at an apartment building works much less than the domestic help cleaning dishes. The security guard may only sit and in rare cases, he may have to fight a burglar. But, he does more work than a domestic help cleaning dishes. The men are security guards for not just family, but also the society.
Coming back to the alimony argument, the society has to be told to quantify the contributions of the man and the woman to each other including both paid and unpaid work. Though media and society can list 100 different categories of unpaid work that women do, they refuse to acknowledge any unpaid work that men do at the level of family or society.
For example, the men do the work of unpaid bodyguard, coolie, porter, plumber, painter, repairs man, rescue worker, emergency driver for not only the family, but also the neighbourhood and the whole society or the nation. If there is an accident in a beach, it is men who jump in to rescue. Do they get paid for that? May be its time, Govt starts paying every able bodied man for playing such good Samaritan roles.
We often see women lamenting that their husband or partners do not spend time on baby care or change diapers as often as women do. Though, this may not be true, but we have to remember that children are much more useful to women than men. Children work as old age emotional support structures or in India, children are bound to take care of parents acting as a social security system. As men die much earlier than women in old age. The non-earning old age duration for men is almost half of the non-earning old age duration of women. The women get double the benefit of children than men. So, what is the problem if women do double the work on childcare than men? In many countries, the pension laws are completely biased against men.
So, the whole intention of the society is to exploit the men and force men to take disproportionate amount of responsibilities (financial or otherwise) in a society. As feminism keeps spreading anti-male hate and keep rocking the boat and breaks the family system completely, men will also start counting their pennies and will start putting a price to their unpaid work and will demand equality as the society can no longer fool men by showering entitlements on women as it did always.
What does a woman contribute to a man in 3 months of marriage? It is nothing. It is zero. But, courts will demand the man to pay life long alimony if this marriage breaks after 3 months. They may in fact instruct the man’s boss in company to deduct the salary and pay to the wife. This is naked aggression on a man. This is nothing but making a man pay a life long pension for having sex with the woman for 40 times. If the woman decides not to remarry and have a boyfriend instead, then the man will be paying her for her entire life. Is the cost of 40 times sex so high? Today, with sexual revolution, women have more sexual desires than men. So, why do the man have to pay?
So, we end up where we began. Alimony converts a woman into a prostitute and a man is forced to pay this prostitute pension for whole life. Now, if a woman sacrificed and contributed to a man in a long duration marriage more than the man contributed to the woman, it has to be quantified. Then, the man can be told to pay the differential amount. Until this context and quantification happens, the concept of alimony should be stopped. Let all the courts and law makers sit in a closed room, quantify and create formula taking into account the unpaid work and sacrifices done by both man and woman in a long term marriage.
Today, there is a sinister conspiracy to keep men pinned down with over-responsibility. However, Society can not keep men in the unpaid protector and provided role for long, while it keeps insulting and denigrating them every now and then.