Do you settle your 498a case with wife for divorce?

| June 24, 2013

One of the most important issue that most men grapple when in marital problems is, should they do a monetary settlement with wife for freeing themselves from criminal cases to get divorce. In fact, this is the advice given by most relatives, colleagues and bosses in corporates. So, should men settle the case to move on?

It is certain that a lot of men did monetary settlements with wife for getting divorce. Initially, it was a reasonable amount based on the duration of the marriage. But, as time passed by, women and their parents started making exorbitant demands on their own or due to the advice of relatives and lawyers. They thought that the man is desperate for getting divorce and he does not want to get harassed running around courts, hence he will pay up. In due course of time, the aim of the wife, in-laws and the lawyers became not monetary settlement, but seeking revenge by financially ruining the guy. They want to send the guy and his parents to prison and at the same time they seek to ruin the guy and his family financially.

So, most often any discussion on monetary settlement can actually worsen the condition of the guy. Once the wife’s family is very clear that the guy wants a monetary settlement and divorce, then their game is geared towards both revenge and also towards making the guy completely bankrupt. Now-a-days, women demand 25 lakhs, 40 lakhs and even couple of crores for a marriage of just an year or two.

The worst way to deal with such extortion is to start a negotiation by offering smaller amounts of money. This not some vegetable haat bargaining of cabbages in Village. Never bargain and never negotiate. Never give any offer from your side. Just ask, how much money they want. If they say any exorbitant amount, then just walk out by telling them, “We will think about it”. Then prepare to fight criminal cases and get bails for false cases etc. The point is, if you make a counter offer of couple of lakhs of rupees, that will only make these animals more vicious and in the end, you will not only lose money, but also spend time in jail and you will not even get divorce as they will not keep their side of promise.

Let me give a simple example. If the wife’s family demands 30 lakhs and you offer them a maximum 10 lakhs, its certain that they settlement talks will fail. But, the wife’s family becomes bold thinking that pressure is working on you and you came up to 10 lakhs. So, they will unleash all false criminal cases of 498a, D.P.Act, IPC 406 on you and your family to stretch you further. That way, they can seek revenge and also think of stretching you to 15 lakhs or 20 lakhs. Now, imagine, they demanded 30 lakhs and you offered them nothing and walked out laughing at them. They will still file a false 498a case and DP act case, but their moral will not be as high as in first case. They may worry a bit thinking this guy may not pay any money. When you offer them nothing, their confidence will be low. If you can protect yourself from 498a arrests by being smart and by using a good lawyer and from advice from Men’s Rights Activists, then their game is up. They will have to run around Family Courts to seek maintenance and their dreams of getting a big sum of money in a short time will be over.

The best way is to decide that any woman who files a false case of section 498a, or dowry harassment deserves no money, because it is a criminal act to implicate innocent people in false cases. Of course, it is the choice of a person in the end. It is always good to make such a woman run around courts for couple of years, if she has such a great passion for dragging innocent people to police stations, jails and courts. In the end, Karma catches up with them and they get what they deserve.

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